FLASHBACK AND DISPLACED
I was 15 years old when I didn’t dare to go to school anymore, living nearby there was an extra problem, from several classrooms you could look in our living room and on the backside the neighbors could see me, I was their babysitter feeling very ashamed, I was sitting in the hallway so nobody was able to watch me, on the other hand I felt neglected. Specially because the gym classes were on our site of the canal, two times a week my classmates passed our house. Right now I do have a house of my own without a mortgage and lots of precious belongings who ment a lot to me emotional as well. I feel lost again and displaced worse than ever before.
Don’t know when time is coming my fear for the death is less than this situation and what will happen seems to me very clear.
Today it’s rather common employees doesn’t do anymore as told, so although I am paying I remain a beggar. And to get caretakers it’s a mission impossible. Who can I trust and believe in?
Ondanks dat ik een eigen huis heb, voel ik me ontheemd en dat ben ik ook… Bij niemand horen…. en dan nog afhankelijk ook. Mijn nachtmerries zijn daardoor ook veranderd.